Rumors
by dstrekharrylover
Summary: When a reporter from the Federation News Network is assigned to the ship to investigate rumors regarding Kirk and Spock, Christine, newly engaged to Spock, decides to confront him once and for all regarding his relationship with Kirk.


**Rumors**

**By JM Lane**

DISCLAIMER: Everything belongs to Paramount but my imagination and this story.

At first Christine Chapel couldn't have been happier. After all, she had loved Spock for a long time and when he actually asked her to marry him, seemingly out of the blue, she couldn't accept fast enough. Unfortunately, there was always one fly in the ointment, and it came from a most unexpected source.

She didn't want to believe these rumors, but considering what she had endured before she and Spock announced their engagement, she couldn't help wondering if there wasn't something to them, despite her friends Nyota and Leonard assuring her that rumors always traveled most rapidly when they didn't have a leg to stand on, so she had nothing to worry about. After all, Vulcans did not do things casually. When they consented to romance, it usually meant bonding and marriage.

Neither could she complain that Spock wasn't giving her sufficient attention, particularly when they were together—in fact, he couldn't have been more attentive, waiting on her in a charmingly Old-World manner that she thought had gone out with the Old World itself, kissing her hand, holding doors open for her, getting food for her and helping her on (or off) with her jacket on occasion if they happened to be on a date and she was wearing one…things like that. Even at that, there was always a nagging doubt in the back of her mind whenever he wasn't with her. No, she couldn't fault his present behavior; it was his _past_ behavior that gave her cause for concern. Particularly his behavior with one James T. Kirk.

I mean, how could it not? What was a girl supposed to think but that there was something wrong with her when the man she worshiped spent the majority of his time with another man, seeking him out rather than the woman who loved him? He _had_ to know this; after all, he was telepathic. Yet he not only continued to ignore her, but she had even caught them in each other's arms (more than once!) and if the Captain's head wasn't on Spock's shoulder, it was vice versa…once even stroking each other's hair or backs. If this continued, Christine was sure that it would be only a matter of time until they were caught sharing a bed…although they would no doubt have a plausible excuse for doing so, at least at first glance. She just hoped that it wasn't her who found them like that.

One time she had even caught them in the Rec Room when they thought they were alone; Spock's head was cradled in Kirk's lap and again, he was affectionately stroking the Vulcan's silky black-brown head. All the things she had always longed to do, but had never dared even suggest to him! She had backed out quickly before they could detect her, but that picture often came to her unbidden, usually just when she least wanted to be reminded of it.

Brotherly affection was fine, but how often did brothers act as these two did? To her way of thinking, they acted more like lovers, and she didn't need the rumors to think this. Simple observation had done that a long time ago. And then she was supposed to believe he was serious about marrying her after all the years he had kept her at a distance? Just how much attention could she expect after their marriage, as opposed to before? How did she know that it wasn't all  
a smokescreen to cover up his true relationship with Kirk? Not close friends, as they claimed, but lovers—and what's more, _long-time_ lovers.

In fact, she had half a mind to confront Spock with this, find out just what the situation was… and if he claimed to anything resembling affection or love for her when she knew otherwise, simply by his past actions toward her, she would be able to easily refute it. It seemed the best way she could think of to protect her already lacerated heart; she had already endured enough pain on his account for a dozen women. No man, not even Spock, was worth shabby treatment…and nothing he said or did now could change what he had done to her in the past.

Perhaps it was foolish of her to put something she had wanted for so long, dreamed of for so long, in jeopardy… but neither did she have any intention of being made any more a fool of than she already had been. If Spock was truly sincere in his feelings for her, then he would understand her doubts and have truthful, loving answers ready for all her questions—and best of all, demonstrate to her that whatever he had done in the past was over permanently and that he would never push her away again, particularly not in favor of Kirk.

If he didn't, well…at least she would know and act accordingly to get on with her life—_without _him. She would frankly rather have torn her heart out than leave him, but even that would be easier than being married to him yet having him constantly neglect her by continuing his suspiciously close relationship with Kirk…and only act the attentive husband in public. And even then, quite possibly because Kirk had told him it was the best thing to do! At least often enough to offset any chance of malicious gossip. Privately she would be left alone while he pursued his so-called friend for love and attention rather than herself.

She had heard of women marrying men like that and what they had endured and had no intention of enduring it herself, whatever she had to do. There was nothing more lonely than a neglected spouse, a spouse married only for cover-up purposes, for the sake of convenience…or for the sake of bearing a designated heir. Neither did she have any intention of marrying a man who did not love her fully, completely and unreservedly—and in spite of Spock's claims otherwise, such as "I would not ask you to marry me if I felt nothing for you," she was simply not convinced that he felt anything resembling either affection or love for her.

As the old saying went, talk was cheap. Actions spoke louder than words—and virtually all Spock's previous actions regarding her were the polar opposite to what he was claiming now. Especially after learning of the other women he had pursued, even in the midst of his relationship with Kirk. As far as that went, he could even be bisexual, although she had heard that most individuals of that persuasion tended to favor the gay side over the straight side.

Still, when it came to women, the Vulcan had seemed to have a preference for blondes with light eyes. Not to mention short women…or at the very least, certainly less than five feet eight, such as she was. Leila Kalomi and Zarabeth, to name just two, were both five feet five in height (or below) and possessed of both blonde hair and blue eyes. Two of the other women had dark hair and eyes, although that came as no surprise to her, since both were of Vulcanoid stock--T'Pring, his former bondmate, and the female Romulan Commander, which Spock had supposedly seduced in the line of duty.

_Yeah, I'll bet,_ she almost sneered. _He can claim what he likes, but how often does a so-called normal man truly object to seducing a beautiful woman?_ From what she had heard from McCoy, the Romulan woman had definitely been what he termed a "knockout", looks-wise, so what was to stop Spock from feeling the same way?

There had even been rumors that Spock had a thing for Nyota, an exotically beautiful African Bantu woman from Kenya in the United States of Africa, considering how much time they spent together, both on and off the Bridge--but the latter had dismissed that in no uncertain terms when it was put to her.

They had never been anything but good friends, and that was the way she intended it to stay…particularly given the fact that Christine loved him and she did not believe in pursuing men who were spoken for, if only emotionally speaking. Neither had Spock ever pursued her, at least not as far as Christine could tell. _If that's true, it would certainly be the first time,_ _that's for sure,_ she couldn't help thinking nonetheless.

At any rate, the reporter from the FNN that was coming within the next week would likely get to the bottom of things in this regard (and others), thus ensuring that both Christine's and the inhabited Galaxy's curiosity would be satisfied as to the feelings behind the professional façade of the _Enterprise_ command officers once and for all.

She was frankly hoping that the journalist would be Vulcan or at least seasoned enough to be able to see through any stonewalling or double-talk, much less any pretense and denials either Kirk or Spock might try to pawn off on them…much less any instructions Kirk might give him as to his actions, such as telling him to spend more time with Christine, as he would with Uhura, while the journalist was aboard ship, in order to hopefully offset any pointed questions he or she might have about their feelings for each other. To say the least, that would be _extremely_ suspicious. Spock should _want _to spend time with her, not have to be told to do it!

She would make sure to keep careful track of the time Spock spent with her after the journalist arrived, see if it increased appreciably in the near future…and if so, ask him pointed questions herself as to why. If they _were_ what she suspected, however, all the better. It would serve them right to be exposed, as far as she was concerned--particularly if they attempted to cover it up! She was also hoping that the journalist wasn't easily fooled by impeccable acting and wasn't easily intimidated. It could even come down to one simple factor—such as the journalist's being able to tell the difference between sincere love and regard and blatant pretense.

Of course, even if Kirk and Spock couldn't be made to tell the truth regarding their relationship, she doubted that Leonard would have any compunctions about voicing his own suspicions of same, although she suspected that he would also do it discreetly and anonymously. Particularly due to the fact that he had been just as neglected and shunted aside by his so-called friends and was just as tired of it as Christine herself was. A close friend of theirs confirming the suspicions of the Galaxy at large would be a perfect way to make those self-righteous, two-faced bastards come clean once and for all!

Perhaps she would even find out the _real _reason Spock had proposed to her…and it frankly wouldn't surprise her if he'd done it simply to have something to hide behind for the journalist's benefit, because if Kirk knew, Spock surely had to know that he or she was coming and acted to conceal his sordid "extracurricular" activities as rapidly and completely as he could.

No doubt he was hoping that their engagement would accomplish this end and never mind that Christine had seen through his pretense right from the start. For that reason, she was determined not to be fooled by any so-called declarations of love and devotion on Spock's part because she would know why he was doing and saying them…much less the true reason why he wanted to see her more often than he normally did, usually once or twice a week up to this point. At the proper time, she fully planned for that two-timing four-flusher to get a taste of his own medicine and see how _he _liked being on the receiving end for a change.

Meanwhile, she had to get through the coming week…and if things hit the fan the way Christine suspected they would upon the journalist's arrival, it would be a _very_ interesting two weeks (the length of the journalist's stay)--to say the least!

It was unbelievable how fast the aforementioned week passed; almost before they knew it, the courier ship bringing their VIP passenger was hailing them.

"_Cochrane_ to _Enterprise_," the youngish male voice came through Uhura's ear receiver.

"_Enterprise_ here," Uhura replied.

"Passenger Jean-Richard Pearlmann ready to transport aboard," the same voice informed her.

"Transporter Room has been notified," Uhura told the disembodied voice. "You may energize at any time."

"Thank you, _Enterprise_. Energizing," the voice came back. "_Cochrane_ out."

Uhura then swung around to face Kirk and Spock, who was standingbeside the command chair. They had heard enough of the exchange to know what to do, so Kirk put Sulu temporarily in charge and gestured to Spock with one hand. "Uhura, get McCoy down to the Transporter Room immediately," the Captain called over his shoulder as he and the Vulcan entered the turbolift.

"Dr. McCoy is unavailable. He is in surgery," Uhura informed him.

"Then get Dr. Chapel," Kirk threw back. "We need at least one representative from the Medical Department there."

"Yes, sir. She will be there."

With that, the turbolift doors closed behind the two command officers and they were on their way to greet the oncoming passenger—a passenger they believed they were prepared for, at least as far as any questions he might ask was concerned…but belief and actuality can be two different things. Both were due to be unpleasantly surprised—and far sooner than either of them could have imagined.

It was a quarter of an hour later that they arrived in the main Transporter Room to find Christine waiting for them; the three went in together to find a fortyish Frenchman just stepping off the platform, hand already out to greet them. "Jean-Richard Pearlmann, FNN," he stated as Kirk stepped forward to shake his hand.

"James T. Kirk, Captain of the _Enterprise_," Kirk remarked with a smile as he returned the handshake. "This is my second-in-command, Commander Spock, and my Assistant CMO,  
Dr. Christine Chapel. Welcome aboard."

Pearlmann turned to Spock and greeted him Vulcan style. "Commander Spock."

"Journalist Pearlmann," the Vulcan returned even as he returned the greeting.

"Dr. Chapel," Pearlmann nodded and smiled, reaching for her hand to lift it to his lips to kiss it as she moved to greet him. "I am honored to meet you."

"The honor is mine," Christine smiled. "We hope you have a pleasant stay aboard ship."

"Thank you," Pearlmann smiled. "Now, if I may be shown to my quarters…"

"Of course," Kirk assured him. "Dr. Chapel, escort our guest to his quarters."

"Yes, sir. Journalist Pearlmann, this way." She turned for the door and Pearlmann followed her after gathering his luggage; Kirk and Spock watched as the pair departed, then turned to each other after the doors closed behind them.

"Well, what do you think of him, Spock?" Kirk asked as he searched his Vulcan friend's sculptured face. "Seems like a nice enough sort."

"That remains to be seen," Spock returned cautiously. "We must always keep in mind that he is a member of the press and that anything and everything we say or do is likely to find its way into the public eye. For that reason we must be on our guard and not reveal too much."

"I suppose you're right," Kirk conceded. "Just the same, it makes no sense to alienate the man without good reason. That wouldn't help our cause. In essence, we should be as friendly yet as professional as possible."

With that, the two command officers returned to the Bridge, content to let Christine deal with their guest for the moment, confident that she would also be as friendly and professional as she knew how to be. Unfortunately, they would eventually be proved wrong…but not until it was too late to stop Pearlmann's article from being sent all over the Galaxy.

Upon leaving the Transporter Room, Christine led the FNN journalist down the hall to the nearest turbolift which would take them to D Deck, where the VIP quarters was located.

"So, how long have you served with the FNN, Mr. Pearlmann?" Christine asked conversationally.

"Just over fifteen years," he replied. "Hey, I'm the reporter here. I should be the one asking the questions," he laughed.

"Sorry," Christine returned with an apologetic smile.

"It's okay," Pearlmann remarked, returning the smile. "Your curiosity is understandable. Now may I ask _you_ a question?"

"That depends on what kind of question it is," Christine replied cautiously.

"Nothing drastic, I promise," Pearlmann assured her. "Or at least nothing I would not ask your permission to use before including it with my article."

"What did you want to know?" Christine asked as they entered the turbolift and she gave the order to go to D Deck. As the doors closed and the car began moving, Pearlmann began to speak.

"I am given to understand that you and Commander Spock are engaged to be married," he commented.

"We are," Christine confirmed. "But I must point out that that is not a question."

"No, it's not," Pearlmann agreed. "But I'll get to them quickly enough. Now, can we continue?"

"Of course," she smiled.

"How long have the two of you known each other?"

"At least fifteen years," she replied.

"Did you both immediately realize your attraction to one another upon meeting?"

"I did, although I'm not so sure about Spock. Vulcans aren't ones to show overt interest in the opposite sex."

"Yet he must care for you now, since he has asked you to marry him."

"Yes…I believe so, although it's sometimes hard to tell just what he's thinking or feeling at any given time."

"There is something else I am curious about. As I said before, though, I will not include any of your commentary without asking your permission first. Even then, I will likely either change names in order to protect your privacy, if not use initials."

"There are rumors that Commander Spock and Captain Kirk are…shall we say…more than friends. As a close associate of them both, you would be in a position to know one way or the other. May I ask what you believe is their true relationship to each other? Close friends, lovers or something in between?"

Christine took a deep breath before jumping in with both feet. "From what I've seen, I would have to say that it seems to be the latter. Something in between. There are times they seem to be merely friends; other times I would swear they act like lovers."

"May I ask what some of those ways are?" Pearlmann asked carefully just before the turbolift doors opened onto D Deck and the pair headed down the hall to his assigned quarters.

"Let's get behind the doors first," she cautioned, quickening her step so they reached the doors of his quarters and they entered it, Christine not speaking again until the doors were safely closed behind them. Shortly after Pearlmann had settled in, they moved to his desk and he seated himself behind it, whereas Christine seated herself in the chair in front of it.

"This may take a while, so if you would be so kind as to punch me up some Altair water, I would very much appreciate it." Christine's smile seemed to be all that was necessary for Pearlmann to do her every bidding. Once they were settled, each with their own drinks, she decided to give him the whole story of her love for Spock and how he had treated her over the years…among other things.

Once they neared the end of their talk, Pearlmann gave Christine a sympathetic look. "How did you ever manage to endure Spock's treatment of you?"

"I look at it this way," she returned matter-of-factly. "As much as it hurt to be treated like a second-class citizen, it would have hurt more to have had to sit back and watch him with another woman. It's hard enough to endure watching him with the Captain. However, when you consider Vulcan standards, to even be a second-class citizen is better than most people's first-class. Of course, with Spock, the gap between first- and second-class is as wide as the Grand Canyon."

"Although you would have liked first-class a lot better," Pearlmann returned smoothly.

"Of course," Christine had to admit. "But one takes what one can get."

She then told him of the various ways she had caught Kirk and Spock together which could be construed as that of lovers. He had never seen anyone so willing to spill their guts about anything in his entire career as a journalist and was glad that he had decided to turn on his tricorder at the beginning of his conversation with Christine. It was obvious that she had kept her emotional turmoil inside for far too long, and if he had any further questions on the subject, he was sure she would be glad to provide him with the answers.

"I think that's enough for now, Dr. Chapel. May I continue our discussion later? I'd like to get some information from your shipmates now."

Christine smiled gratefully. "Sure. Just let me know when."

"I'll do that. Good night now."

She got up and headed for the door; he followed her and once again kissed her hand in farewell. "I'll be looking forward to it. Good night."

As Christine made her way back to her quarters, she knew she had likely talked too much; she could only hope that Pearlmann would keep his word and ask her permission before using any of what she had told him. If he didn't and either Spock or the Captain found out, much less anyone else, she'd never hear the end of it. It was a horrendous chance to take, but she couldn't deny that she felt infinitely better after getting it all off her chest with someone who was willing to listen.

She was well aware of Pearlmann's reputation so she wasn't _too _worried, but if a given subject was explosive or controversial enough—and it concerned legendary characters like Kirk and Spock, it was entirely possible that he would forego his customary ethics in order to bring the explosive news to the Galaxy at large, whatever the damage might be to the aforementioned officers' careers and reputations.

Of course, the way she was feeling at this given time, she wasn't all too concerned about that. Frankly she was more concerned about how it would affect _her_ should the news get out. Kirk and Spock seemed to be practically invulnerable when it came to scandal of any kind, simply judging from the amount of times they had gotten out of scrapes that would have put anyone else's butt slung up a flagpole—which was why she truly believed it wouldn't hurt them that much. She could only wait and see what the next thirteen days would bring—just what else Pearlmann would find out while he was here.

In the meantime, Christine was due to meet with Uhura and discuss all she had confessed to Pearlmann with her closest friend. She could well imagine what Nyota's reaction would be once she knew—not to mention Leonard. They would no doubt both think her insane to knowingly risk her new-found relationship with Spock, but that was a risk she had to take. She had to know once and for all just how he felt toward her—if she would be first, even if only when she and Spock were alone together in marriage or eternally second in his heart. And if it turned out to be the latter, she knew what she'd have to do, however painful it turned out to be. It had been difficult enough being a second-class citizen in recent years without adding marriage to the mix, which would simply aggravate an already serious problem.

That afternoon around 1530, the two women weaved their way through the three-quarters full Officers' Lounge to a secluded booth on the far starboard side behind an artificial oasis and seated themselves. They were too engrossed in their conversation to notice Pearlmann discreetly following them with a tray of his own and his voice-operated tricorder at the ready to catch all they said.

He had gotten information from several others in the same manner, waiting until the women had situated themselves before surreptitiously sliding into the booth nearest them and placing his tricorder where either of the women's voices would activate it once they began to speak. Meanwhile, he began to attack his own food with relish, always keeping one ear cocked in their direction.

They were silent for so long that he was beginning to wonder if they were ever going to speak again, then almost as soon as he'd thought this, they did just that. "You won't believe what I did today, Nyota," Christine began.

"What did you do?" the other woman prompted.

"I told our visiting journalist about Spock's and my relationship," she confessed, taking a drink in order to avoid her friend's horrified eyes.

"Which relationship? The present or past one?" Uhura took a swallow of her own drink.

"Some of each," Christine told her. "Or more accurately, how I felt about Spock spending far more time with the Captain than with me, as well as how they tended to act whenever they thought they were alone together."

"Chris, are you crazy? If Spock gets wind of it, he'll drop you like a hot potato," Uhura warned before cutting another piece off her African-style steak, stopping her hand just in front of her lips. "And the Captain will likely feel justified in officially reprimanding you…at the very least. Also, you've waited a long time for Spock to propose to you. That's a lot to risk just for the sake of revenge."

"Believe me, Ny, I know what I'm doing. I've got to know how I can expect to be treated in a marriage with him—whether I will be first, if only when we're alone together in a romantic situation and setting…or if I'll be an eternal second. I've already taken enough of that these last few years to last me a lifetime; I couldn't stand a moment more."

"I suppose I can understand that, but be careful, Chris. If this backfires on you, you could regret it for the rest of your life."

"I'm well aware of that, girlfriend, I assure you," the ACMO tried to soothe her concerned companion. "And I'm ready for whatever happens."

Despite her brave words, Uhura detected worry—if not sadness—in the other woman's voice and knew if her scheme didn't work, she could easily lose Spock forever and have only herself to blame. "Don't worry, Chris. I'll be pulling for you." Uhura was only about halfway through her meal, whereas Christine was almost finished.

"Thanks. I'll need all the luck I can get. Got to get back to work now. Talk to you more later."

"Later, Chris." With that, the Bantu woman returned to her own meal, barely noticing when Christine got up and left…and certainly didn't notice the man on the other side of the oasis getting ready to leave himself. Nor did Christine happen to notice him, being too preoccupied with the ominous possibility that her scheme to find out the truth regarding Spock's feelings for her would backfire drastically in her face.

At the very least, neither he nor Kirk would be likely to speak to her again, if it ended up adversely affecting their personal relationship, much less their professional reputations. In that event, even if she managed to stay on the _Enterprise_, they would be likely to make life hotter than Hell for her. Or at least Kirk would; Spock would be more likely to develop a layer of ice both around his body and heart (if only figuratively) which would effectively freeze her whenever they happened to be in each other's vicinity…which would likely only be whenever absolutely necessary, and then only on ship's business.

_Please, God, help him to understand why I'm doing it,_ she silently prayed to the Supreme Being she had begun to worship in her youth and still followed today. _However he truly feels about me,_ _I love him so much. I don't want to lose him, especially not over something like this__…but I truly don't think he'd be willing to come clean if I asked him—if only to supposedly avoid hurting me with the truth of his feelings for me, such as they are. As it is, I may eventually confront him about it anyway if the outcome of this present situation proves inconclusive. _If only for the sake of her own future happiness, Christine truly hoped that the outcome of the current situation would prompt the answer she sought.

As it turned out, she began spending so much time with Pearlmann that even Spock noticed—and he did not hesitate to approach her on the subject. During their next dinner date, which was by some odd coincidence the day after her latest get-together with Pearlmann, the Vulcan set aside his customary silence during meals for a serious discussion.

"I wish to speak privately with you, Christine," her companion said after taking a long swallow of his Vulcan citrus drink of _kahlin_.

"So speak. I'm listening," she returned absently as she did the same on her side.

"You have been spending a lot of time with our guest of late," he pointed out.

"So?" she prompted just before taking a bite of her entrée.

"You are my bondmate. It is unseemly for you to spend personal time with another man." He sounded stern, as if scolding a naughty child.

"Come on, Spock. It's not as if I'm having an affair with him," Christine scoffed. "He merely wanted to ask me some questions."

Spock's gaze hardened, his version of a scowl. "I can imagine what sort of questions."

"Don't worry, I wouldn't tell him about what we do after-hours," she assured him—a little too quickly for the Vulcan's taste. "Or are you more concerned that I might tell him what you and the Captain do after-hours? Or for that matter, just how much off-duty time _you_ two spend together? Certainly a lot more than you do with me, even since our engagement became official."

"How do you know anything about that?" he threw back.

"It's kind of hard to miss," she retorted after taking another bite of her entrée. "Besides, you do what youdamn well please when we're not together; why shouldn't I?"

"It is one thing to spend personal time with your lady friends, quite another to spend it alone with another man," Spock returned coldly.

"We're _not_ alone," she denied. "The vast majority of the time, we're surrounded by people."

"It is the remainder of that time that concerns me," the Vulcan continued as he took another drink of _kahlin_, then prepared to take a bite of his own food, a spinach salad embellished with hard-boiled eggs, garlic croutons, and ranch dressing. "Also, I am constrained to point out that I spend as much time as I can with you. Certainly considerably more than I did prior to our engagement."

"If you haven't got anything better to do, that is," Christine shot back. "Which seems to be 90 of the time, as opposed to 99 before our engagement. And when you do, I can guess fairly accurately where you are. I suppose I should be thankful you're not with another woman, although it doesn't do a whole lot of good for my ego to have the man I love seek out another man's company instead of mine. Not to mention let him do things with you that you've _never _let _me_ do, not even now." Christine took yet another swallow of her own drink after her lengthy speech.

"Do you expect me to forego all my other personal relationships and spend all my off-duty time with you?" Spock almost snapped.

"Of course not. Don't be ridiculous. I'd just appreciate your not being so judgmental about the other people I spend time with. After all, I don't tell _you_ who to see and not to see when off-duty, so what makes you think you have a right to tell _me_?"_Although I sometimes think somebody should,_ she couldn't help thinking, making sure to shield her thoughts so he didn't pick it up. "Just how would you feel if _I_ dictated to _you _how much time you could spend with other people?"

"You are my bondmate," the First Officer reiterated sternly.

"But not your slave," the ACMO tossed back. "Neither am I a lovesick little robot with no will of my

own. Come into the 23rd century, Spock. You don't own me—not now, and certainly not after we're married. Attitudes like yours went out with corsets and high-buttoned shoes."

He raised a questioning eyebrow at her archaic reference but made no further argument on the subject. "Just be careful in what you say to him," he warned.

"Believe it or not, I always am," she assured him, hoping like hell he wouldn't find out the content of her original conversation with Pearlmann before she could figure a plausible way to justify it.

The look Spock gave her told Christine that he was skeptical of her claim at best, but believed it most logical to give her the benefit of the doubt, at least for the moment…so he didn't argue the point.

"Which reminds me, when are we going to watch your newest musical holovid? It's a cinch that just once, I'd like to see something _before_ I hear about it from the Captain and Nyota rather than after," she groused as she neared the end of her meal.

"I was uncertain as to whether or not you had an affinity for this particular composer," he claimed.

"And you couldn't have asked me beforehand?" she retorted. "Things like that only prove my point. And for future reference, I advise you to keep in mind that Mozart is my favorite classical composer after Tchaikovsky and Beethoven."

With that, Christine stood up and picked up her tray, intending to take it back to the recycler after giving Spock a goodbye kiss on the nose, since she knew he wasn't fond of her giving him a a regular kiss in public. He wasn't fond of this, either, but at least he could live with it...or so he said.

"I've got to get back to work now. Late shift. See you later, love," she murmured Spock gave her a half smile and returned to his own meal. Neither of the couple had seen Pearlmann slip out of a nearby booth just prior to Christine's departure, then discreetly follow her out of the room, unbelieving of his luck in actually being able to catch a private conversation between her and Spock, one of his main targets and the primary reason he was here, no matter what he had originally told his bosses and Starfleet. Hopefully it was only a matter of time until he caught one or the other in a private conversation with yet another friend of theirs--perhaps even Kirk and Spock themselves. He could but hope. For the time being, however, he would take what he could get.

Christine got together with McCoy for a late dinner after they had gotten off-duty and told him of the discussion she had had with Spock three nights previously which had almost degenerated into an argument, as well as the thinly veiled threat she had leveled at him. The CMO had been too stunned to speak for a while, and when he did, it wasn't at all what she had expected to hear…and she told him as much.

"Leonard, how can you say that? You know what Spock's put us both through with his constant pushing us away and keeping us at both a physical and emotional distance, showing us more plainly than any words that the only one that matters to him is the Captain. Never mind that we care just as much. Don't bother him with mundane facts like that. He has more _important_ things to think about." Her voice held a mixture of anger and pain. "Even now, I feel sure that he only asked me to marry him because the Captain thought it was a good idea in order to have a smokescreen to hide behind so people don't think to examine the suspiciously close relationship between _them _right away."

"I wish I could disagree with you, Chris," McCoy sighed sadly, "but when you're right, you're right. If only we could know just what Jim has that we don't."

"We'll probably never know, Leonard. I suppose all we can do is continue the status quo. The only problem is that I don't think I have the emotional strength to keep it up for even a day longer, much less a lifetime." She looked up at him and her gaze hardened to steel. "I don't think you do, either." Her anger dissolved into sadness. "Why must things be like this? All we ever wanted to do was love him. Is that a crime?"

"_He_ seems to think so," McCoy remarked softly, his voice holding identical sadness. "It seems that the only Humans whose love he deems acceptable is Jim's and his mother's…and to Hell with everybody else's, no matter their worth and despite his claims otherwise." The Doctor sighed deeply, sadly.

"Of course, why should it surprise me? He's done it practically from day one. I thought things would change once he got to know us. Well, live and learn. I just wish it didn't have to hurt so much. I hurt enough as it is without that…and it's got to be even worse for you, feeling as you do about him. If only for that reason, I'm glad I'm not a woman or gay. It would likely be just as hellish for me as it is for you."

"Well, hopefully I've at least made him think twice about lecturing me again. He knows he has to keep me mollified or else I'll blab everything about him and the Captain to the press."

"You don't really intend to do it, do you?" the Doctor asked carefully after a long silence on her end.

"Of course not," Christine assured him after taking a long swallow of her vanilla cappuccino, which emptied the large cup she held. "But I don't want _him_ to know that—at least not right away. After what he's put us both through, it's no more than he deserves, if you ask me."

"Ain't that the truth. It'll be fun to watch him squirm," the Doctor laughed as he finished his own coffee. _Self-righteous bastard,_ he finished in his mind. _What makes him think he's so far above the rest of us, other than the obvious? It'll suit me just fine to see him sweat it out for once, if only figuratively. _

Indeed, Spock was doing just that—and not entirely figuratively. He sat at his desk in his quarters, mulling over the conversation he had had with Christine during their last date three days previously…a conversation which had come very close to an argument. She had even threatened to tell Pearlmann about his and Kirk's suspiciously close relationship if he didn't shape up where she (and by association, McCoy) were concerned.

She tended to become upset easily if he neglected her for Kirk too long, and with a part of him Spock wouldn't blame her if she carried out her threat. He would likely have reacted the same in her position. It really was unrealistic of him, not to mention callous and unthinking, to have expected her not to mind, but upon reflection, knew he had done just that—and done it for years. What's more, he had also done it to McCoy…who had long ago proven himself a friend despite his faults, which made his, Spock's, conduct doubly reprehensible.

But they had to appreciate the fact that he was at least _attempting _to make amends to them. A long overdue and half-baked effort, to be sure, but nonetheless sincere. Spock had never felt quite worthy of their devotion to begin with, and after what he had put them through all these years, suffering in silence virtually the entire time on his behalf while waiting for him to notice their feelings for him and act on them, he felt utterly worthless now.

How could either of them have ever considered him worthy of pursuing, either for a friendship or romantic relationship? He certainly wouldn't have, in their position—but they were obviously far more forgiving than he himself would have been in the same situation. It might be logical to speak to his mother on this subject at the first opportunity. Hopefully she could be of some help.

Pearlmann had gathered considerably more than he had expected to during the first week merely by keeping track of Kirk and Spock's closest associates and doing his best to be around them and unobtrusively hide both himself and his tricorder when necessary. However, he had not been able to catch Kirk and Spock themselves; they seemed very cagey, very careful not to show undue emotion toward each other, particularly of a physical nature…but even they were bound to get careless sooner or later and that was what he was banking on.

He had even had more conversations with Christine, which gave him more insight into Spock and why he acted as he did—not only to her but to the crew in general. Even the ordinary crew seemed quite loyal to their command officers and other higher-ups, but it helped loosen their tongues when he promised them anonymity, not to mention first rights of refusal to publish on anything they might say to him in confidence…including her, which eventually prompted her to confess certain private things she and Spock occasionally did together, such as kissing, holding hands and the like. Of course, it didn't happen nearly as often as she would like—and he could guess why—but what mattered to her was that it _did_ happen.

Just before the second week was due to begin, Pearlmann asked permission for him to follow given members of the Bridge crew on a typical day. Kirk was hesitant to allow it at first, particularly since the crewmembers involved included himself and Spock and he wasn't fond of the idea of Pearlmann shadowing either of them, monitoring everything they said and did, particularly when it regarded their personal interactions.

Pearlmann had even interviewed some people close to them—or some who _had_ been close to them...such as Carol Marcus, Leila Kalomi and even certain family members, like Amanda and Anna Kirk. Not all had been willing to discuss their relationships with the _Enterprise_ men, but those who did managed to give him even more insight into Kirk and Spock as people.

Even at that, he was still hoping for the opportunity to catch them together in an unguarded moment. He was well aware of how difficult it usually was to catch Vulcans in unguarded moments, but considering the fact of Spock's well-known affection for Kirk and the fact he was half-Human, that might be just enough to tip the balance in his favor. Still, he had to be careful; he didn't want them to get too suspicious of him or be seen as hanging around them in particular.

As soon as Kirk gave him permission and informed the Bridge crew of what was coming, Pearlmann lost no time in following the individual crewmembers around, a different one every day. He intended to save Kirk and Spock for last, if only to give them both a false sense of security that he was not here to attempt an exposé on them and their personal relationship. If nothing else, he might have to employ someone whom they both trusted to get close enough to them and carry a wire or "bug" connected to him on their person—perhaps even Christine.

He hadn't decided for sure one way or the other on that yet. For the time being, he intended to continue his own personal attempt to catch the Captain and First Officer when they believed themselves to be alone together. Only that way could he be certain how deep their feelings for each other went. If they ran as deep as he suspected, despite their almost stiffly professional demeanor around each other while on duty, the news would likely rock not only the Federation but the entire inhabited Galaxy to its very foundations.

Of course, all this was perfect fodder for the gossip mill aboard ship. Even the novelty of Spock and Christine's engagement after all this time had essentially worn off and they were back to their favorite topic for both discussion and speculation—just how deep Kirk and Spock's affection for each other ran and what it might mean for Christine should she marry the latter as planned.

Neither did everybody enjoy the idea of having a member of the press aboard ship for even a short time, at least partially because there was a chance something about one of them might find its way into Pearlmann's planned article—but what they were mainly waiting for was to see what he would say about his two principal targets and those closest to them, specifically aboard ship.

It was near the end of the week that Pearlmann thought he would at last get his chance to catch his two prime targets alone together long enough so that they would give each other away once and for all. His eager anticipation was such that he could scarcely wait until their intended… rendezvous, as it were. Just the same, he knew that Vulcans could usually sense the presence of others; even Humans could to a certain extent.

So he brought out an experimental, very sophisticated device invented by a friend of his who was a technological genius much like Spock, but fully Human, which would theoretically allow someone to mask their thoughts and physical presence for a few hours, small enough to stick in one's ear like a hearing aid.

He had been waiting to try it out ever since he'd obtained it and now, with luck, he'd get the chance at 2100 hours this Friday evening once the two command officers got off-duty and got together for their  
…rendezvous. Oh, was he ever going to enjoy writing _this_ particular article, particularly if he were able to include the juicy and potentially explosive information that the two top _Enterprise_ officers were lovers, despite one's engagement to the ship's ACMO. For now, all he could do was wait.

Pearlmann had learned that the aforementioned "rendezvous" would be taking place in the large main Rec Room located on G Deck, equipped with virtually everything a couple would need for a lengthy time alone together—privacy, warmth, a soft, comfortable place to sit or recline, even food, drink and romantic music if they desired it. He decided to go there early and sequester himself, along with his device which would mask his thoughts and physical presence, some food and drink of his own and his trusty tricorder set to begin recording as soon as the two in question arrived and began to speak.

He also set it on a panoramic view of the large room, although he would be able to zero in on a particular point or scene as he chose afterward without being detected. Of course, he also knew that he would have to be very quiet since where he was was not soundproof; if he made any sound, super-sensitive Vulcan ears would surely detect it and that would never do.

After a time he heard the doors of the Rec Room open and close, then the voices of the aforementioned pair began to speak. "Would you like something to eat, Spock?" Kirk asked; there was a pregnant silence before the Vulcan's deep, throaty voice replied.

"I suppose it would be 'the logical thing to do', as has been said, although I am not that hungry."

"I'm no expert on Humanoid physiology, and certainly not the physiology of your people, Spock, but I _do_ know it's not good for anyone to go without food too long…even Vulcans."

Spock sighed deeply, then said, "Then let us obtain nourishment." With that, the two headed for the food service computers and called up some food. Pearlmann couldn't tell just what kind of food they had chosen from the angle and distance where he was, although by what he could smell, there was both the scent of fried chicken and cooked vegetables in the air.

He then noted that they sat in the corner group which normally accommodated six, although there were just the two of them…and began eating. He couldn't be sure what kind of drinks they had but consequently suspected they had ordered the same type of drink, even though the Captain was generally more likely to go for something alcoholic than the Vulcan was. After a time, they began to speak again. Obviously Kirk respected many of the Vulcan restrictions, which included not speaking during meals.

So far he hadn't detected anything which might incriminate them as far as being lovers was concerned, but the night was still young…it could still happen. It was around 2300 before Kirk called for a beautiful yet unfamiliar piece of music; it didn't sound like anything from Earth, so Pearlmann assumed it must be from Vulcan. Once it had begun, he softly whispered something to Spock and the Vulcan nodded in agreement. A moment later the Human moved to the corner so he could lean on the padded seat back, then Spock moved to rest his head on the Human's left shoulder and half-closed his eyes, sighing contentedly.

"Comfortable?" Kirk asked softly after a short silence.

"Very," came the equally soft reply. "It has been very difficult to…relax, as you say, with our guest around. I have had to be on my most formal and professional 'Vulcan' behavior, so he does not guess—or misinterpret—the depth of our relationship. It is good to be able to 'let my hair down' at last."

"I know what you mean, Spock," Kirk concurred, affectionately resting his cheek on the Vulcan's silky dark head and tightening his corresponding arm around him. "But he won't be here much longer, then we can get back to normal. Do you like the music? You once said it was one of your favorites."

"Affirmative," came the soft reply.

Even here, Pearlmann couldn't detect anything more than close friendship, at least not from the pair's body language…although it could certainly be implied from their words. Still, if Christine's and others' opinions were anywhere near accurate, it was only a matter of time until something would happen which indicated once and for all how things were between them.

"Jim?" the Vulcan asked after another silence.

"What, Spock?" the Human asked, somewhat drowsily, having nearly fallen asleep waiting for the Vulcan to speak again.

"I had a most…disturbing discussion with Christine the other day," he confessed. "She was most upset with my—treatment of her and threatened to 'expose' us if it did not improve."

"I'm sure she didn't mean it, Spock, if she was as upset as you say. Human women often do things like that when they're upset. Nine times out of ten they don't do what they threaten to do."

"What if this is the one time out of ten where it _does_ happen?" he asked half-fearfully, half out of concern. "I know I have not treated her as she deserves, but neither do I wish to… 'lose' her, as you say. I…value her far too highly for that."

"Then we'll just have to do all we can to convince her otherwise—or rather, you will. After all, no matter how it seems, we _are_ simply close friends. Closer than most, especially because of the bond between us, but certainly not to the extent most people seem to think. Still, it's probably a good thing you're going to have someone else you can turn to for love and affection. It might also be a good idea for me to find a new girl as well. It's been a long time."

"Such as Miss Uhura?" came the hesitant suggestion.

Kirk laughed. "Trying to play Cupid, Spock?"

"Negative. It is just a suggestion…although she _would_ be a logical choice."

"There's that word again—although I can't argue with you on that score," Kirk remarked as he brought his other arm around to completely enclose his Vulcan friend's slender body. That _definitely_ made Pearlmann's brows shoot into his hairline! Just as they remained there as Kirk's hands covered those of Spock as the two seemed to fall asleep. Another indication that matters almost _had _to be more than they claimed…but if they were truly gay lovers, wouldn't one's suggestion to romance someone else of the opposite sex _upset _the other rather than make them laugh, since it would mean their spending more time apart?

Of course, from what he'd heard of Kirk, the Human was almost as adept at hiding his true feelings as the Vulcan was—had extraordinary self-discipline, definitely a cut above the average Human. If Spock was truly marrying Christine merely for the sake of attempting to conceal his gay relationship with Kirk, what would stop Kirk from doing the same with the _Enterprise_'s Communications Officer?

He supposed the only thing he could do was continue to listen, even as he noted the time and began to have some food and drink of his own, still being as quiet as he could, even though the Vulcan music was still playing. It went on until almost 2400, then the end of it seemed to rouse Kirk enough to say, "Computer, play Beethoven's _Pastoral Symphony_, then Tchaikovsky's _Nutcracker Suite_."

After the music had resumed, Kirk seemed to lapse back into sleep, still holding his Vulcan friend protectively. It was by this time that Pearlmann found himself nodding off. If they didn't leave soon, he was sure that he would fall asleep up here and he didn't want to do that if he could help it. Of course, if he could manage to leave a few minutes after they did, it was unlikely they would ever know he had been there—at least not until the article came out.

It wasn't until nearly 0200, though, that Christine and McCoy came looking for the pair. _All the better_, Pearlmann thought, for it was possible they might say further private things about them without his even having to ask. The doors opened and closed, then McCoy said, "There they are, Chris, just as I said."

"Yes, I notice," she returned, her voice hard and thick with sarcasm. "Still, I think it's time we woke up the sleeping beauties, don't you?"

"Definitely," McCoy agreed, and the new arrivals quickly made their way over to the other two—and the Doctor reached out to gently shake Kirk's shoulder. "Jim…Jim, wake up. It's 0200. You've got to get to bed…and not here."

It took a little while for Kirk to even partially awaken, instead trying to shy away from the offending hand in his sleep, both moaning and softly swearing under his breath before finally reluctantly opening his eyes slightly to a blurry vision of McCoy and Christine, who looked like she could have cheerfully throttled him upon noting not only Spock's head on Kirk's shoulder but the latter's arms around him.

He supposed he couldn't blame her for being upset that Spock didn't do something like this with her more often, but at the same time, wasn't about to apologize for doing it since it had been almost as long since he had done so as it had been for her. Not that she would be likely to believe that, of course, but there was little he could do about it. All he could do was gently encourage Spock to go to Christine as often as necessary after this in an attempt to allay her fears as to her place in his life and heart.

That might mean some extended times alone for him, but if it was to help his friend, he was willing to make the sacrifice. Just the same, that didn't mean he had to be alone _all_ the time…he could always call on Uhura to spend time with him while Spock was with Christine. If she was unavailable, of course, he would have to rethink his plans, since he really wasn't interested in anyone else aboard ship at the moment. For the moment, though, it was necessary to wake Spock up, then get up himself so they could return their respective quarters. As far as that went, maybe Christine could spend the rest of the night with Spock and he could call Uhura to spend the rest of the night with _him. _

_Spock,_ he called through their bond. _Wake up. Bones and Christine are here. _

It didn't take as long for the Vulcan to rouse from his sleep-trance, although he saw the same look in Christine's eyes and on her face as Kirk had moments earlier. "Christine," he murmured softly.

"Spock. I see you've been…enjoying your rest," she returned, her tone poisonously sweet and effectively communicating her displeasure with him.

He could not deny it, unfortunately; all he could do was simply remove himself from his compromising position as rapidly as possible. "I know what you must be thinking, Christine, and I am…sorry for upsetting you in this manner. However, I am—too weary to argue the point with you now. Let us simply return to my quarters…"

She didn't catch the rest of his words, however, being too preoccupied with assisting him to his feet. Moments later the pair were pointed toward the door and made their goodnights to the other two, leaving McCoy to handle Kirk and get him safely to his quarters. It wasn't until all were gone that Pearlmann snapped back to reality, having fallen asleep briefly in spite of himself. Whatever he had missed, fortunately, would still have been recorded, so he could go over all his research notes later, as soon as he had gotten sufficient rest and was ready to write his article. He only had two more days left of his time aboard ship; that should give him sufficient time to wrap things up and get ready to return home. The other things he needed to do could wait until then.

Spock and Christine's night together (at this point all that was done was sleeping) went fairly peacefully; it wasn't until they had awakened and prepared to go on duty after having breakfast that the Vulcan decided not to give her the opportunity to interrogate him before he got his chance to do the same to her. He hadn't said anything to anyone, but he had detected another's presence, even above and beyond the device the person wore…and suspected that it was their guest from the fourth estate.

What's more, he suspected who had alerted the man to his and Jim's whereabouts in time for him to supposedly record them having both a private conversation and lounging in a compromising position. Of course, he wasn't about to apologize to anyone for his actions—at least not the aforementioned journalist. He did not owe the man any explanations; what he had been doing and his reasons for doing it were his own business and Pearlmann could think what he liked. It mattered little to Spock what the rest of the Galaxy thought; what he and Jim did off-duty had no bearing on their command abilities.

"Christine, I have a question to ask you and I expect a complete and truthful answer," the Vulcan stated as the two entered the nearest turbolift which would take them to the Officers' Mess and their breakfast.

"What would you like to know?" she wondered as the doors closed behind them and the car began to move toward their destination.

"Were you aware that our journalist guest had been hidden in the room while Jim and I were there?"

"No, of course not. Why would I—? Hold it just one second, Mister. Are you implying that _I _told him where you and the Captain would be?" Christine's eyes began to flash sparks in his direction and her voice became hard. "He's been a journalist for 15 years; he knows all the tricks. The last thing he needs is help from me! For your information, I had no idea whatsoever where you two were. It was Leonard—Dr. McCoy—who told me where to find you. And even then, he had to ask the computer."

Spock's own eyes had turned hard and cold as obsidian, which prompted her to continue.

"Even if I _had_ done it, which I didn't, could you really blame me, after all you've put me through these last few years? What do you think that does to a woman's ego? I was even foolish enough to think that I would see you more often once Pearlmann was here, even if it was only to attempt to throw him off your and the Captain's trail.

"If I didn't love you so damn much—and only God knows why I do, the way you act sometimes…I wouldn't put up with it for a moment and I _certainly_ wouldn't have agreed to marry you! I've had enough of this second-class treatment to last me a lifetime. I'm telling you here and now, Mister, that you have a colossal nerve questioning _my_ conduct after all _you've_ done – and I'm letting you know in no uncertain terms that you can do what you want _outside_ our quarters door, but I had damn well better be _first_ in our marriage and _first_ in your mind and heart when we are alone together in our bedroom. Otherwise it would be simply a waste of both your time and mine to even attempt it because no matter how close we would be physically, I would know where your mind and heart was. Can you sincerely assure me at this late date that you'll even make the attempt, much less actually follow through?"

Spock was too stunned to speak for a moment, which Christine unfortunately took wrong.

"I thought so," she returned with a mixture of anger and sadness. "I should have known it was too good to be true. Heaven forbid you cut into your _precious _time with you-know-who—but good old Christine, she's proved that she's willing to take whatever abuse and neglect you care to dish out and not kick if it means you deign to spend time with her, and therefore won't complain if you decide to cut back on your time with her. Not if she knows what's good for her…even if you make no explanation and simply cut back, automatically expecting her to understand and not be hurt at your effectively slapping her in the face yet again.

"Never mind how much _she_ loves you, supports you, needs you and is capable of helping you; none of that matters." She took a breath and continued her tirade; she was wound up like the proverbial eight-day clock and couldn't stop until she'd said her piece. "And another thing—if I was really in league with Pearlmann, I'd have had him here right now, taking in all this. It would make a perfect addendum to his article!" With that, she stalked off a short distance before turning back to offer this last shot: "So I suggest you examine your own behavior after this _before _questioning mine, not after!"

Spock still had not been able to refute anything she said, mainly because he had been unable to get a word in…but this time, he was determined to do so. "Christine, attend!" His cold, sharp voice froze her in her tracks, although she still didn't turn around. "Christine, you will come back here immediately! I did not give you permission to leave!"

"I didn't _ask_ for any," she shot back. "And I am not a backward child to be ordered around at your whim!"

He chose not to answer that, simply said, "I have something very important to say to you and I would prefer to do it in private. Is it too much to ask that you cooperate, if only for as long as it takes me to do so?"

"Why didn't you say this earlier?" She had turned around to face him but otherwise hadn't moved.

"You did not give me the opportunity. Your emotional tirade prevented it."

His calm, matter-of-fact voice reached her as his ordering her back had not. "All right, I'll give you the chance to speak…but we haven't got a lot of time, so you'd better make it as succinct as possible." She moved to join him.

"I assure you I shall," he threw back. "Now, if you would kindly join me, our breakfast is waiting." She then took his arm and the couple once again headed for the Officers' Mess and their morning repast.

Unfortunately Pearlmann's needing his sleep had prevented him from witnessing this exchange between the two combatants, but the gossip mill would still give him at least a fairly accurate testimony of what they had said to each other…and he had a good enough memory so that he would be able to recall the vast majority of it long enough to dictate it into his tricorder along with the rest of his research.

As for the exchange between Spock and Christine, it was as succinct as he could possibly make it…not to mention convincing enough so that she was unlikely to ever doubt him again. At least not immediately. He saw to that. After all, actions spoke louder than words; in addition, it was the only thing he could think of to do in order to make his point to her in the time available.

But neither would Pearlmann be present to observe this; again, he would hear it secondhand through the gossip mill as he was preparing to leave the ship. But even though he was able to catch it in time to include it in his article, he cursed being unable to observe it personally, if only to witness a Vulcan kissing his betrothed…and what's more, in public view!

But at this point in time, Spock didn't care who saw him do it. What was most important to him was convincing Christine once and for all of his sincerity…and if mind-melding with her, showing her every ounce of the feelings he bore for her, then kissing her in public was the way to do it, so be it. Now all they needed to do was see how Pearlmann's article turned out. Spock was convinced that it should be a _most _satisfactory display, not to mention _fascinating _reading.

For the time being, they each had work to do and intended to do it to the best of their ability, as they usually did. After that, however, he intended to show Christine just how wrong she had been about him—and would _continue_ to do so, for every possible moment of their married life…starting with the the dual weddings which would bind them together forever: or at least for as long as both of them lived.


End file.
